First and foremost I want to express my deepest gratitude for what is happening and for what is to come.
I was taught that I wasn’t enough, and from that idea I always tried to fit into a square that I didn’t belong in. I was told I spoke like white people and I listened to “white” music. I guess that made me not enough in my own blackness around my own people. I was always different. I never followed the crowd, but was to afraid to fully go out on my own. I would hide and suppress who I truly was. I never fit in but in reality I wasn’t supposed to. Everyone around me muted my thoughts and ideas until it crushed my own creativity. I stopped doing everything I loved because I felt like whatever my mind created wasn’t good enough. That’s why i spent so much time afraid of speaking my own truth or sharing my work.
I never felt good in my own skin because I didn’t have the “build” of a black girl I was always small, and guess you could say “lacking” in some areas.
Without effort I always got by so I started to believe just getting by was all that matters. I stopped trying to excel a long time ago. As I grew I watched my family struggle with money, but as long as they had the bare necessities that’s all that mattered. I started to believe that’s all that mattered. I always say it doesn’t matter what happens I’ll figure it out, I’ve come from a line of women figuring it out. These things, these ideas, the thoughts buried so deep inside of me that I thought this is what life was.
I can’t be myself because who i was isn’t good enough. I can’t be free in my own thinking because it makes me look crazy. My ideas became like everyone else until it started to suffocate me. I followed in footsteps that I never belonged in. I stayed in darkness for too long not realizing I was the light. I can no longer silence myself to make others happy or comfortable. I can no longer fit into a square that I never belonged in. The reality of the situation no one fits into the square.
I don’t want anyone to think this is a blame game because its not. This is just a truth that I chose to choose for too long.
Today, I choose to be my most authentic self. Today, I choose not to care what others think about me because in reality what you think about is not my business. In reality what you think about me is only a projection of how you feel anyway. Today, I choose to be as unique as i was made without the fear of judgment. I’ve seen and heard things that your mind couldn’t understand. I’ve met my higher self and until you meet and greet yours nothing that I say to you will make sense anyway. Today, I choose to be light. Today, I choose to be happiness. Today, I choose to be love. Today, I choose to be who I was created to be. Today, I choose to be abundance. I choose to shine my light on others for the world to see.
SuperPower
My words hold weight against the greatest things imaginable. My words are where my super power lives. I write because my words tell a story of what’s to come and what’s come to past.
I’ve learned to speak only when spoken to, but that gave me greater listening capabilities. While you thought your words were more important than my own, I sat in my own silence finding my own power.
My power are my words that will no longer be silenced. Everything that I’ve said has to come to fruition, yet people still dont believe. I have nothing to prove, but I just want to share.
My words are what keeps me afloat. The ability to stop myself from drowning just by putting words down on a piece of paper. I plant seeds by using my words I give light to the darkest minds.
Words so simple, yet so freeing. My words are my super power anchoring in the storms that have come to destroy. My words also build within the chaos, build to something much better than we’ve ever known.
My words are where my superpowers live.
Glory
Let me bask in the glory of this sunrise.
Thankful that I’m alive to witness it, as simple as it looks today something about it seems the most beautiful.
Thankful that thus far my family, friends and myself have been covered and protected.
Let me bask in the glory of the sunrise.
As a reminder that I recieved another chance at life. I recieved another chance to get it right. The warmth of the sun wraps around me to tell me that it’s alright.
Let me bask in the glory of the sunrise and if you so happen to miss it take this moment to just be in glory.
It’s a new day! Someone didn’t get this chance to witness! Today with that big of a blessing make the best of it even if it’s being “stuck” in the house.
It’s a time for healing, a time for introspection, it’s a time to stop being afraid of the dark.
BE LOVED AND BE LOVE!
The Irony
Isn’t it ironic that when people need the most love is when you have to social distance?
Think about that for me a minute…
The fear that exudes from the eyes of people and you can’t even comfort them and tell them it’s okay.
Fear is the opposite of love. They can’t live in the same space.
So while everyone is pumped up with fear how do we permeate that barrier with love?
In what ways can you tell someone that it’s okay even in our own spaces?
What could you do to ease the mind of someone else?
How can we show compassion when we aren’t allowed to touch? And we haven’t been taught how to use our words?
Where do you find the words in the depths of your soul where love lives?
How do you find it for yourself to ease your mind?
Grateful hearts lead to beautiful results.
LOVE IS THE HIGHEST VIBRATION!
BE LOVE AND BE LOVED!
Love Is
Love is the highest vibration I think we could all agree to that. Fear and love lives in the opposite spectrums they could never live in the same space.
So while all of this stuff Is going on around us do we choose fear or do we choose love. Looking around there’s a lot of panic and fear. There’s stress of the unknown, but if you believe in your religion or spirituality, how can there be fear?
Not saying take things lightly do your part in making sure others are ok because that’s what the world needs it needs everyone to operate in love.
Love is actually the point of life, love of self like real love not this self-hating love people are spewing. Love of others genuine love being understanding of others even when they hurt you. If you loved and understood yourself when someone hurt you there would be a better understanding of the hurt that dwells inside of them and it has absolutely nothing to do with you.
Love conquers all! Literally oh and don’t forget to start your day with a grateful heart not only does it make you feel better, but you give out positive vibes to those you encounter
Perfect Never Enough
I’m perfect, but never enough. Knocking on the door of my subconscious wanting to come in and marry the two. I know we were taught that we were perfect, but never enough; I’m here to tell you to forget that notion we’re not perfect, but we are more than enough. With our lack of perfection the fact that we keep pushing and trying makes us perfect it makes us enough.
People see the drive that you have and it makes it easier for them to push you away. It’s not your fault how people perceive you, it’s your fault if you stay in a place of lack. It’s not your fault that people don’t think they deserve your light, but it is your fault if you dim yours to make everyone comfortable.
I’m perfect, but never enough. It’s your fault if you don’t open up your possibilities, it’s your fault if you stay in a space of lack, it’s your fault if you want to carry this burden.
I’m perfect, but never enough. Once again it’s your fault if you let people control how you feel about yourself, it’s your fault if you can’t get pass this hurdle. This is one of the biggest ones this one unlocks the mind of limitless possibilities.
Don’t be afraid of what you worked for, don’t be afraid of the rewards promised you. Fears had been faced many times and this fear is no different from the last, but I promise you. Even in your imperfections you’re more than enough. The only thing that makes you perfect is the need to keep going and push forward.
Ability to Move
God is not separate from me the minute I separate the two is the minute I lose all power.
Once again what one believes has nothing to do with this journey. Do whatever brings you comfort in your trying times, but whatever it is you do search your truth.
The universe is working in your favor pushing and pulling when it needs to, the minute you go with the flow things fall into place.
Ask yourself why do you stay? Is it a sense of loyalty? Is it a sense of fear? So comfortable that you’d rather wake up and dread going somewhere? Walking into doors that you don’t necessarily belong in, walking into doors for a fear of not being able to pay a bill.
Did you know you receive more when you do something that you love? Did you know that you didn’t have to be stuck? Did you know that you’re not a tree and you’re not planted anywhere, even trees are moved and repurposed when their time is up.
Yea I know, you liked that one that one caught your attention. What will you do with it? What will come from this? What will your next step be?
Set Me Free
Set me free of this bondage, I no longer want to be tied down by emotions. I want to be free to create, I want to be my creator. Set me free of this bondage that keeps me stuck in a loop.
Set me free of this bondage, that is stopping me from living. Stuck in a false reality between the old me that lives with fear and the new me that is free of all and able to make her dreams come true. Set me free of this bondage that keeps me in this loop.
Set me free of this bondage, that is starting to control my emotions, stirring up things that can no longer be buried. Stirring up the ability to be understanding, stirring up the tears because I just want everyone to be done. Out of this loop of disappointment, loop of what they think life is supposed to be, loop of pain and hurt. Set me free of this bondage that keeps me in this loop.
Set me free of this bondage, i can no longer go on like everything is okay. I can no longer hold the weight of someone else. I can no longer bare the responsibility of how someone else feels. I can no longer be weighed down by any of it. Set me free of this bondage that keeps me in this loop.
Set me free to fly as high as the hawk in the sky. Set me free to have the precision of a laser. Set me free.
1 Out Of 7.53 billion
I belong. Out of 7.53 billion people I’m 1 of them. Within all of these people, how do I not belong?
How can I see myself as less than? Or undeserving when I’m able to be 1 out of 7.53 billion. I know you’re saying how does that make you special if there’s so many other people?
I’m special because there’s only one me. Not one other person possess the gifts that I do. How can I not see this within myself? When I’ve witnessed people trying to be better just off of a conversation that we’ve had, better yet just by watching me work my own magic.
Everyone has a story surprisingly all of the stories seem similar. Heartbreak, abandonment, sickness, and death. My story is mine though and its mine to keep because it led me to this place and this moment.
This moment of trying to be alive, the moment of pulling myself together, the moment where I dont want to just live, eat and die. The moment where my absolute truth is mine.
1 out of 7.53 billion people and my purpose is to tell my story so that there is no confusion to who I am, who I’m going to be. This way when you tell your story there’s no confusion in who you are or who you’re going to be.
Inner Child
She’s hurting. When I’m healing her we are on top of the world, when I include her she’s the most productive and aware person imaginable.
She’s hurting. When I think it’s fine to go on without her she throws a tantrum. A tantrum just like a child saying things that we really don’t mean being self destructive.
Why would she want to ruin anything for us?
She’s hurting. She trust me to take care of her and I’m letting her down. I dont talk to her I don’t make her feel safe. I forget. That’s the problem she’s always been forgotten.
She’s hurting. She can’t tell you how she’s hurting, she can’t tell you what she needs from you if you don’t listen to her.
She’s hurting. I feel her and want to make her better. I promised to bring her with me, but at the smallest points of my happiness I forget about her.
She’s hurting. How can I forget about her if she’s apart of me? I disconnect from her correction she let’s go of my hand when she feels not needed. I don’t include her in my happiness only in my sadness.
She’s hurting. That’s the only time I listen to her when we’re both hurting. I have to keep her at all times. She’s my strength and my glue, she’s the one that truly makes it right, without her I’m nothing, she’s the one that holds it all together, she’s the one that deserves to be in the light.
She’s hurting. She’s my inner child and I have to be just as good to her as I am my own child. Without her there is no me.
She’s hurting but I promise to help her heal.
Soul's Purpose 