Finding a home

Sometimes I feel like a motherless child rings in my ears and pierces me through my soul. When I hear that song, it puts me in a chokehold.

Today, the story changed as I was listening to the song and allowed myself the freedom of not getting caught up in emotions. I realized that I had been blessed with some of the best women and mothers I know.

The ones who pray over me in silence and out loud. The ones who shower me with an abundance of knowledge and love. They show me their mistakes, so I won’t have to go down the same road. They love my child as if she were their own. They show me what they’ve done right to lighten my load so my path isn’t too dark.

Today was the last day that I felt like a motherless child because I found a home in too many women for me to feel alone.

Letting go (again)

My notebooks were issues from the past that I no longer needed to hold onto. They were the energy that was keeping me stuck. The words that will live forever are those I’ve already shared or will share in the future. They are not the words that went and died on paper. There is a level of something in the air where I am free to write and create again. I felt stagnant, not realizing it was because I had too much old trying to make the new. Letting go, I always feel like, eh, I might need this, or this has something for me. I don’t need it, and there is nothing.

There are cycles that I’ve completed that no longer require the desperation of my words: the pity and the begging. The God pick me vibes. Why me, God, vibes. I promise i’ll do better vibes.

This is where we come into our power again and become God chose me; I’m going to show you why there is no desperation or begging. Little steps, but I can’t keep the energy of pick me when I’ve already chosen me.

The energy of letting go.

Authority

Who gave you the authority on what you speak about or have it in your heart to talk about?

The observations, the ah-ha moments. The ideas and plans to move forward. Who gave you the authority over your voice and mind when I liked you better when you didn’t have a sense of your own.

I enjoyed the time spent when I could think for you and you did what I wanted you to do.

We were best friends at that time, but now. Now you’ve found your authority to speak and think for yourself, making me hate you.

I don’t enjoy the ideas that you have. I dont want the fact that I could no longer be your puppet master. I was pulling the strings to your heart and mind. How dare you cut the cords and be okay without me?

How dare you be able to stand up straight without me there to hold you up?

I liked you better when I could think and speak for you when your thoughts were mine.

How dare you allow me not to use your light as my own. The thief in the night comes to destroy.

I tried to destroy you. Better yet, I didn’t try to destroy you. I wanted to build you up to be the person I needed you to be for me. I needed to hide behind your light. I couldn’t allow people to see me for who I was because, in reality, who was I? My kids became my everything.

Better yet, you were my better half of me. The one who looked like me, so I could see myself in you to get another chance in life.

How dare you shift and take the light away from me and keep it for your own. Use it and make yourself better when it’s left me to drown in darkness.

I liked you better when I could think and speak for you.

Who gave you authority over your own life?

Greenlight

I am terrified of you, and yet I can’t get enough. I follow my heart, and it leads back to you. At the same time, my mind continues to play tricks on me.

But how could I listen to those stories that I make up in my mind when everything says green.

Greenlight. She reflects the darkness that lives inside of you.
Greenlight. Once you find your light, you shine a light on her darkness and help her heal.
Greenlight. You both somehow feel unworthy of each other.
Greenlight. You feel unworthy of her because you feel like you can’t measure up in her material world.
Greenlight. She feels unworthy because she realizes you want nothing from her except her love.
Greenlight. You both are having a hard time trusting the other.
Greenlight. You both proved you guys were in the long run.
Greenlight. Your souls transformed the minute you guys met.
Greenlight. Dont be afraid.
Greenlight. She only speaks what you feel in your heart.
Greenlight. It’s time to overcome it.
Greenlight. Love is in the air.

Open your heart

Open your heart. It’s been closed too long, allow the Spirit of love to move through. Get back to the space of happiness and creativity.

Open your heart to the unknown. Smile. Be free. Be love. Be fearless. Be you.

Open your heart.

Be free. Get what you deserve, and remember people and God are not for sale.

Trust the process

Open your heart.

This latest episode I speak about wanting to find yourself and God and no longer being able to ignore yourself. It's time to move through the world and let go what no longer serves us. The things that we say we want we won't even go get we become scared of our shadows. If i say the answer is right there you won't go because it's outside of your beliefs. What if I told you the answers are everywhere. You know what you want you just won't go and get it. God is telling you to search for him in the darkness and you won't go because of the tainted beliefs of others. Find your truth and run free. When you could listen to your inner voice is when you could be set free from everything that holds you back.  Set yourself free. We speak to the universe in place of God, but God is the creator of the universe and we're here to co-create with Him in all that we do. Stop being afraid to take charge of your life. It's yours for a reason.  I mentioned my ebook during this episode it's available for free download at coachingjustintime.com also the link to the Bible app. Who is God? https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/17398. This life is about you and what you want and how you're going to get it. Seek out your answers for yourself. — This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app
  1. What do you want?
  2. The rainbows in the storm
  3. It's okay to not be okay
  4. Finding your light
  5. Finding the balance

The Wildflower

The wildflower grew from the wild child. They were carefree and marched to the beat of their drum. They were led by music that only they could hear.

The feeling of freedom comes with a price. The ones locked in a mental prison become guards to the free. Don’t do this, don’t do that, you don’t make sense, too many colors, too many smiles. How dare you be happy when you have nothing?

The wildflower dies in the wild child. They begin to conform to what society says rules. They wilt and die and forget they need nothing except themselves to make them happy.

The adult emerges and looks for happiness outside of themselves, forgetting about the time they were wild and free. They forget about the time the wild child was alive.

No one could ever sever the roots of the wildflower. The only question is, which parts of yourself are to be watered?

Is it the roots of the wildflower that grew inside the wild child who marched to the beat of their drum?

Or is the adult that emerged from what society says rules?

For me, I choose the wildflower that grew inside of the wild child because, without her, am I really alive?

Calling All Souls

I am calling all souls, calling all souls, calling you to try to break free, free of bondage, and free of pain. The hardest thing is to try to connect, but they hear you because I listen to you.

I see you when you walk past me; I hear your silent screams. You see me and have never felt so safe. So you gravitate towards me to feel the warmth of my light.

At first, I didn’t understand until she said, even amid your chaos, you’re at peace. I feel your peace, and I try to take it in as my own, even for a little while.

I’m not shaken by things I can’t control, nor do people and their problems move me. What I can do is call your soul to feel the warmth of my light. What I can do is be understanding when you think you’re the most misunderstood.

I am calling all souls to feel my light. To find my truth so that you can be brave enough to see yours too. I am calling all souls to tell you that it’s safe and okay to reconnect. A soul’s purpose to reach all souls for proper healing, the only one that they can do.

Tamirra.holland@coachingjustintime.com

Coachingjustintime.com

Seek Wisdom First

What we all seek is the wisdom to get our lives in order. We seek it forgetting that God is willing and ready to give it whenever we’re ready to receive it; God would never tell you too much at once; He’ll only show you enough to get you excited to work towards your goal.

Allow the excitement to fill you up, and when you need more, ask God to release more wisdom. Free will comes at a price we can’t receive if we don’t ask. Allow God to move with no resistance, and when there is some, be still and work through what is stopping you at that moment. Take it to God and be honest and say, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with this, but please take it away from me and transform it while you continue to transform me.

Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding, for she is more profitable than silver and yields better returns than gold. She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are pleasant ways, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her; those who hold her fast will be blessed.
Proverbs 3:13‭-‬18 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/pro.3.13-18.NIV